Cassper Nyovest has opened up about his battle with depression, revealing that the experience changed the way he viewed mental health and helped him understand people who reach a point where they feel they can no longer carry their pain.
The rapper, whose real name is Refiloe Maele Phoolo, has spent more than a decade building one of South Africa’s biggest entertainment careers. But behind the confidence, sold-out stadium shows, hit records and business ventures, Cassper says there was a period when he struggled to control his own thoughts.
“I used to judge people who commit suicide – wrongly. I thought they were selfish because they hurt the people they leave behind, because I never understood,” he said.
“I thought maybe they were weak or the problem was too big … until I went through it myself, until I went through depression.”
Cassper said being diagnosed with depression was a turning point because, for the first time, he experienced the kind of mental anguish he had previously found difficult to understand.
“I was diagnosed with depression, and for the first time in my life I could not control my mind,” he said.
“I started understanding why people say things like, ‘I just want it to end, I just want peace.’”
The revelation offers a different perspective on a man who has long been associated with success, ambition and an almost larger-than-life public image.
Born Refiloe Maele Phoolo in Mahikeng, North West, in 1990, Cassper developed a passion for rap at a young age. He started rapping when he was about 12 and eventually left school at 16 to pursue music, moving to Johannesburg in 2008 to chase his dream.
His journey was far from guaranteed. After early struggles in the music industry, he eventually established Family Tree Records in 2014 and released his debut album, Tsholofelo, that same year. The album produced major hits including Gusheshe and Doc Shebeleza and helped turn him into one of the most recognisable names in South African hip-hop.
Cassper then transformed the idea of what a local rapper could achieve commercially. In 2015, he staged Fill Up the Dome, selling enough tickets to establish the Fill Up concept that would later move to major stadiums around the country. He subsequently took the concerts to Orlando Stadium, FNB Stadium, Moses Mabhida Stadium and Royal Bafokeng Stadium.
His catalogue grew with albums including Refiloe, Thuto, Sweet and Short, Any Minute Now, Sweet and Short 2.0 and Solomon. His music career has also earned him major industry recognition, including Metro FM Awards, South African Music Awards, Channel O Music Video Awards, MTV Africa Music Awards and a BET Award.
But Cassper’s journey has not been without personal challenges.
He has previously spoken about experiencing mental exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed during a difficult period in his life. In 2024, he revealed that he had been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and said his struggles eventually led him towards his Christian faith.
His family has also remained an important part of his personal story. Cassper is the son of Muzuki and Letsebela Phoolo and has spoken about his family and the loss of his brother, Khotso, who died in 2003. He is also a father to his son, Khotso Izwe Simba Phoolo, who was born in 2020.
Away from music, Cassper has built a reputation as an entrepreneur and has explored other areas of entertainment, including boxing. His high-profile boxing bout against actor and musician NaakMusiQ in 2022 ended in defeat after five rounds, adding another chapter to a career that has rarely followed a conventional path.
Yet the latest chapter of Cassper’s story is less about trophies, money or stadiums and more about his mental wellbeing.
He said depression made him feel trapped and convinced him that there was no way out.
“I felt like there was no ending to this prison,” he said.
Cassper explained that turning to Jesus became an important part of his recovery, although he stressed that healing was not immediate.
“For me personally, I turned to Jesus because I did not want to take medication, and it was not an overnight success or victory,” he said.
“It took time, but to find myself today in a place where I’m free. I love my life. I’ve let go of the concept of control, and I just take each day as it comes and everything is so meaningful.”
For an artist who spent years projecting strength and certainty, Cassper’s willingness to speak about feeling mentally overwhelmed reveals another side of his journey.
His story also underlines an uncomfortable reality: success does not make someone immune to depression. Behind the public image of “Mr Fill Up”, the hitmaker and businessman, there was a man who says he reached a point where he could no longer control his own mind.
Now, he says, he has found a greater sense of freedom and meaning, and a deeper understanding of the struggles that many people experience silently.
